Feeling old for your age? Well you're not alone...

Is it just me or are all twenty-plus people under the same amount of stress?
Really now; when just like me you too are in that age group of twenty-one to twenty-nine, then you’ll probably be able to relate to what I’m about to say. I mean we are so young, but gosh, the stress we have to endure at such young an age is just totally unbelievable! Seriously! And I’m not even working yet so I couldn’t just imagine what my contemporaries in the labor market are dealing with. But hey, I’m not exactly in a bed of roses either. Maybe a bed of thorns? Or nails? Or road spikes? Whatever, you get the point .
I don’t know about those who have, at least at this moment, chosen the lifestyle called “bumming,” but whether you’re working at some multinational capitalist company, or competing with your way-older classmates while earning your masters degree, or giving it all out for law school albeit it all seems for naught, being at this age is surprisingly stressful. Tough work, inhumane law school, competitive and gossip-loving colleagues, classmates with whom you have apparently irreconcilable personality differences…whatever it is, you have to admit: there’s just so much sh*t in life, and it seems as the sh*t just piles up and up, until it’s so high that giving up and running away appears to be the easy solution.
Yes, we’re young, but who could have thought that we’d age so fast in a matter of months?
I’m not sure if anyone else can relate to it, but sometimes, when I talk with other people about the fatigue and the stress of being at this age, I can’t help but theorize as to why we’re enduing so much (or at least why we feel we’re enduring so much). You might think, “Oh there he goes again with all those actually meaningless rationalizations…etc.”, but hey, can I help it? Social Science major-duh! And besides, you probably will relate to this.
Upon graduating from college, it seems as though the world is ours to conquer. Suddenly we’re independent, suddenly we’re making our own decisions. We don’t have to deal with curfews (at least most of us do), we can travel to anywhere we want (on its face something patently false), club all we want, and basically do everything without anyone having to watch over our every move. Freedom!
But the party is cut short.
Then comes the rather late (but should have been obvious anyway) realization that with greater independence comes so much responsibility. We’re set “free,” we’re out there in the world “deciding for ourselves,” when really, we carry with us the heavy load of expectations of…well, everyone! You do realize that it’s not just you banking in on your future, or what’s set to happen in your life right? That alone creates such a heavy burden-but wait, there’s more!
Then there’s that odd internal own age ambivalence phenomenon; if it’s an ugly, unscientific-sounding name, then you try coming up with a name! (Though it really is an ugly, unscientific-sounding name…) What I’ve realized about being at this age is that it’s so easy for us to accept the independence and the positive features of (hold on to your seats-) adulthood, but there are just so many things about being nine or thirteen or sixteen or eighteen that, upon entering “grown-upness” (yet another ugly invented term), we inevitably have to give up. And usually, these are the things that provide for us comfort, that protect us from stress or tension or whatever negative it is out there. Especially if you’re away from home (i.e. working or studying in Manila, away from the “province” [Yes, everyone in Manila is still convinced that only their city is urban and the rest of the Philippines doesn’t have electricity yet…let’s save that for another entry]), then you’ll know how difficult it is to be away from all that’s comfortable and familiar.
But hey, we're still young right? At the end of the day, nothing can get more youthful than a twenty-one year old drooling over a bottle of Red Horse and dancing all over club!

Yes, I'm gonna part-teey! Haha!

Celebrity Mugshots

Having attended a party with "Criminal" as the theme suddenly got me thinking about three lovely ladies who I would think would have inspired some people's outfit for the said evening. But then, no one actually wore a "criminal outfit" as I should have expected. I however was wearing my ordinary clothes, upon which I could insist that I came as Andrew Cunanan, the infamous Fil-Am murderer of Versace.

Meanwhile I've really got to give it to this girl Paris.





When you know you're doomed for jail, with a cozen or so big-bodied woman who barely fit that description of...well, a woman, dying to make you their b*tch (rhymes with hitch), the last thing you'd think of is making the right pose for the photographer taking your picture, and of course, giving you're sweetest smile. But no, Paris is in an absolute league of her own. When usually the normal person worries about his liberty, or about how he's ever going to get unscathed, Ms.Hilton, as usual, worries that she might give a bad picture! Now that is poise under pressure. Let me qualify: extremely unnecessary and clueless poise under pressure.



Still, it's poise. Kudos for everyone who never wants a bad picture of him or her self taken!


I am totally disappointed at Lindsay Lohan's shot. Surely she must have foreseen the possibility of her arrest taking place any time soon, given everything that she has been doing, and yet she fails to prepare for this event! I mean is she trying to say something in this picture? Or is she so high that she thinks that guy in front of her is still a paparazzi? Well let's just hope she didn't run over him or something.







I love Nicole Richie but her hair is without a doubt the messiest of the three. The "main bang" is in place but all the other strands are pointed towards various directions, hoping to escape from the humiliating situation their owner has put herself into. I love the look of her face though...it's almost as if she's flirting with the photographer. Lovely.

Random thoughts on DIETS

There's a reason the word diet is the way it is, and why it means what it does. I don't know if anyone has, like I, come to the simple conclusion that it really is a combination of two concepts. The first three letters of the said word spell out "die," simply because going on one almost feels like dying. But that's not all; the "t" in the end stands for "thin", so in effect, a "diet" is a dying desire to be thin. Well, either it's a "t" for thin or it's how you want to look like after your diet, that is with you're arms stretched out. But any way you look at it, it makes sense.

Going on diets means making huge sacrifices, sacrifices which necessarily entails the voluntary desistance from life's essentials and imperatives for sustenance and survival otherwise called food. Yes, going on diets necessarily sucks. But yet, we love engaging in them as if our will power was so strong that it could resist the sweetest mousse or the darkest chocolate or the juiciest slab of grilled pork.

Wow, the image of those above-mentioned items wants to make me punch my fist into the monitor.

Meanwhile, those who are strong enough to resist from the life process we call eating have to endure that freaking hunger that has to come with the diet. Whoever said diets are fun hasn't gone through it. Going on a diet is the strangest way and possibly cruelest way to punish one's self.

Some people really need to go on diets, for health concerns of course. I mean a deep, contemplative, anti-superficial person like me would like to think that health reasons would be a person's primary concern for trying to be fit. Still there are those who simply suffer from BDD, or are actually very fat depending on whose perspective it is you take.

I have said absolutely nothing because I intend not to.

COMPELLING TRENDS for Men, Spring 2008

the see-through...from yohji yamamoto

the hints of color...from salvatorre ferragamo

the biker jacket..from salvatorre ferragamo

the non-natural and neon colors...from burberry

the hockney...from louis vuitton

the light and layered look...from giorgio armani

the hammer pants...from dior homme
the shawl and the formal outfit...from dolce and gabana

Cropped pants from commes des garcons...

the pajamas...from prada

Battle of the Supermodel Blogs

On a lighter note, I've recently noticed that one of my favorite blogs on the internet has been running short on entries. I'm talking about elysesewell.livejournal.com, one of my favorite top models. In case you've followed America's Next To Model like a mad, loyal dog follows his strongly-odored master, then you'll probably kno0w her as Robyn's sworn enemy from Season 1. I think it started like as a battle of the moral and the immoral, Robyn supposedly being the epitome of morality and everything religious (read: BLIND DOGMATIC HYPOCRITE) and Elyse was like the atheist one; but of the two, Robyn was like THE bitch. Also, you've probably seen her in Giordano ads and posters.

Anyway, she didn't win but hey, she looks like she's doing well in Asia. I guess those types really do well in this continent. By saying those types I mean the really tall, extremely thin, with pasty-white skin, short jet black hair, and wide almond eyes models: they're well-received here in Asia. Norelle, from Season 3, is doing great in Japan.

So this is about Elyse. Aside from the fact that it's rare to find a supermodel capable of producing thoughts, I also love Elyse for the fact that not only does she have thoughts, but her thoughts actually make sense! She's really smart! I love the fact that she knows she's a supermodel, but still, she doesn't have to be a major bitch or diva about it! She actually makes a lot of interesting quips about the industry. As a matter of fact, her first entries have been compiled and published as a book: Beauty and Biz.

But probably one of the most interesting things she's written about was when she, out of utter spontaneity, decided to go to the Philippines after some mishap at the airport. I mean hello!? A supermodel in the Philippines? How is that even possible?! I mean as far as I know, there's always been one!

Haha!

Here's part of wat she had to say about her trip:

"My travel plans weren't even halfway baked. I just knew that I wanted to get some Filipino sand in my crack, and I only wanted to travel over land and water, not fly. I ended up taking a bus from Manila to Batangas and a boat to the island of Mindoro, then went all over Mindoro by boat and moto, spending three nights on three different beaches. It was unbelievably easy and cheap to travel, the beaches were lovely, and two out of three were secluded enough to please me. But ultimately I was uninspired by the lack of fresh food endemic to a tourist center accessible only by boat, by the mildew-impregnated Tom Clancy (barf!) I begged off a front-desk clerk, and by the whore-humping hordes of tourists I encountered in northern Mindoro's main city, Puerto Galera."

I so love her! By the way, she also used to be a med student but she had to quit to pursue modeling. And before med, she's already earned degrees in Biology and Spanish, both earned in three years! Wow, the fashion industry is just so fascinating it never fails to attract the brightest minds! Haha!

And this, my friend, marks the beginning of the war of the supermodel blogs!

Surviving the Snake Pit

If by some great misfortune you you find yourself in a hole with these treacherous, heartless, poisonous creatures with your demise as their ultimate goal, here are some things you can do for you to survive. I tell you it's not going to be the easiest thing to do, but sometimes we just have to realize that if you try to be nice to these wicked things, they will destroy you! So what's it gonna be?

1. Don't think that one of the snakes will be on your side to help you.

Again, snakes are extremely treacherous. Don't be fooled by even the nice-looking ones that seem completely harmless. They may fool you with their grace, but their sting kills the most. The sea snake for instance may mesmerize swimmers, especially with the way it moves underwater. But then, it just wants you dead like all others. Sea snakes are usually aquatic, but they may jump in that snake hole even if they don't belong there! The fact that both of you don't belong there may lead you to believe that it is on your side.

2. Snakes usually begin the kill with a sweet embrace.

The constrictors cause a lot of confusion. At first, you may think that the snake is just playing around with you, trying to make you think that it's not really that cold-blooded animal that has been established as a fact by science. But then the embrace becomes tighter, and tighter, until you become the cold-blooded animal as your blood has effectively stopped flowing. So be cautious about those that hug you, because they just might kill you.

3. Learn to differentiate the non-poisonous snakes from the poisonous ones, as some of them may have similar patterns.

The milk snake with it's red, black and orange rings may be mistaken for the coral snake which has the same colors. While the former poses no threat to you, the latter is just like most snakes: seemingly harmless but deadly. Remember though that the non-poisonous snakes aren't really on your side, as they usually do nothing but watch as their fellow snakes sting you to death.

4. Never turn your back on the snakes.

Snakes just love it when you're at your most vulnerable, because then they can all act in unison and bite you when they can! Always be aware of their movements. Take note of their overt actions which may betray an intention to destroy you; know the snakes well. One way to do this is to think in the ways they do.

5. Get ready to suck, and spit out, the poison.

It is simply inevitable that in a snake pit with that many snakes one of them would be lucky or smart enough to have bitten you despite your resistance. Suck it in, then spit it out! You don't want that toxic substance inside you, because if it doesn't kill you, then it might have some adverse effects on those outside of the snake pit whom you would, as much as possible, want protected. Although this has yet to be proven, it's always better to leave the toxic with the snakes as these are the creatures who love it so much anyway!

6. Adapt quick.

Sometimes you just have to be in the snake pit for a long time, because climbing out of it may take days, months, or even years! As human beings, we usually become immune of toxic substances anyway, so if you have to suck it in, don't spit it out! I mean they're going to keep biting and stinging so, gradually take it in until their bites no longer pose any danger. Because then, you're sting or bite might even be more fatal. When that happens, take a rest from all that thinking and analyzing these reptiles. Relax.

7. Turn the tables. The prey has now become the predator.

Although they may have been powerful at first, remember that you can achieve the impossible just by thinking over the whole situation deliberately, then thinking in the way your enemy would. Getting back at the snakes may seem like stooping down to their level, but then, if you want to be vindicated, go ahead. They have their killer instincts, you tried to keep yours under control, but given that doing so doesn't work, then just go for you feel is necessary. Snakes are animals too after all that may just be trying to protect their space or something. That's understandable. But then, when not only are they doing no good but in fact harming you, it's time to make a move.

And in the end, you may have just conquered the snake pit.

What a mess, what a mess, what a mess, what a really big mess!

Whew! Just when I was beginning another pattern of a non-productive behavior which basically involves not finishing or continuing something that I've started (i.e. ditching my blog, haha!), I've decided that hey, maybe I don't want to be stuck doing the wrong things anymore! I mean right now, I'm at that point where one more mistake, one more misstep may mean diasaster, or maybe absolute liberation and freedom (Haha! Well depending on how you look at it...Anyway I'm sure you're not getting that probably because it's a purely personal issue.). Really, now is when I can really say it's either a make it or break it situation. And as I've said, I want to put an end to all the negative things that aren't really helping me "make it." See, the difficult part is translating the attitude into the right behavior or actions. Sure, I really want to kick some serious law ass, but then, thinking that can only get me so far...or as I've learned yesterday, even nowhere!

Obviously I'm not at the peak of my academic career right now.

Now THAT is undermining the scenario which is actually far worse.

But then, I can't really blame myself for such a sloppy school week. Well for one, moving my stuff is so exhausting! Just last week, I officially moved from my previous place of temporary residence in Tandang Sora to one of the dorms within UP. It's great that I'm finally in UP now right? But then, moving was't so easy especially when you find out that, once you've moved in, certain essentials of living are missing. Imagine life with no chairs, no pillows, and no cabinets: I had to live with that for one night! Well I got the chair and the pillow now (after what seemed like a never-ending ordeal of having to shop for these big bulky things in SM), but I'm still waiting for the cabinet!

Still, it's great that I'm finally housed within UP. Although moving proved to be a serious pain in the ass, I'm sure the returns in the long run will be worth it. Besides, it's a great dorm, especially when compared to all other dorms in UP.

So...what was I saying?

Oh, being messy and all that. See that's what Im talking about. I really think that I need to get myself together, otherwise, it would be just one big...pfft. Haha! But seriously, there are just some things that I'm realizing right now that would make me feel really guilty if I INTENTIONALLY or NEGLIGENTLY do some major mess right now. And I really don't want to go through all that drama. The challenge for me right now is to make this real, actually start working on it. I don't want to be paranoid and think that the odds are against me, but thinking that would hopefully help propel me into doing the right things. And now that I've pretty much established myself in that dorm, I hope that this move would help maybe tilt the playing field in my favor.

I know it seems like I'm ranting and whining, but writing and letting it out is actually one way of how I can reflect on it and hopefully do some serious thinking AND acting about whatever situation I am in. Law school continuosuly proves itself to be a challenge to all aspects of a person's being: intellectual, emotional, psychological, even physical! And right now, I would indulge in all possible means of catharsis just to brush it off!

Of course, there's also: WORK, WORK, WORK.

I just don't want it to be such a mess anymore.

ONE GREAT IRONY: First Day as a Sopohomore in Law School...on Independence Day

Hah! You probably thought that I wouln't be writing that much considerning the fact that today marks the beginning of another year in law school. Sure, it gets busy, but hey, I'm just making the most of my time.
Man, the heat of Manila is killing me!
As I mentioned, on this day, I am going to back as a sophomore in law school. By now, it would be easy to assume that I've probably gotten used to all the crap that has to be dealt with once you enter theis "grand" instituion. Now that I think about it, I'd say that it's too early to make a judgment.
So the ironic thing is the first day of classes having to begin on Independence Day...
Now why is that just so ironic that I even have to blog about it? Well, for anyone who has ever entered school, high school, college, law school, or whatever, you'd probably know what I'm talking about. See, the thing with school, or at least how they make us experience it, is that it just takes so much of your freedom that sometimes you'd find yourself questiong whether you're still in school or at some place where people are detained. You could think of it as prison, or maybe a mental assylum, whichever you think seems more apt for your situation. Sure, the whole process of learning and education has as one its goals the emancipation of the individual from the clutches of ingorance. I definitely agree with that. But then, I feel that it takes so much away from you, like your creativity, or imagination and replaces it with information that are...just not you. Yes, the effort to impart knowledge is appreaciated, but to actually force ideals and thoughts and opinions and whatever-that's not right. How do you expect someone to grow into his or her own person with all these dictates?My complaint is probably a sentiment that just has built up from my experience in law school. Is it just me being paranoid or is this some sort of a grand plan to rob me of my individuality so I can become some robot which this school has planned out to be its perfect product?
This is definitely not an attack on education, because, I for one recognize the importance of it and I think that everyone who has the opportunity must take hold of it and do well with it, because trust me, this will bring you a long way. I guess my concern is how they carry it out and how they let the students experience it.
Locked up in an insitution that that frees you...having been unjustly treated by a system that advociates justice and fairness...unlawfulness in law school...some of the many ironies I'm beginning to realize today.
Or should I have just expected them?
***
Let's get this thing going...

Thoughts on a cigarette

As I was waiting for…well, pretty much anything to happen on this Sunday afternoon, I decided to hang out at one of the verandas at SM Baguio to have a cigarette. I really just wanted to hang out and chill out as I spend my remaining hours in Baguio. It sucks that I'll have to leave what, in comparison to Manila, is pure heaven. (Debatable? I'll talk about that soon.) Sure I'll be coming back, but given my totally messed-up schedule for the first semester, I just have no idea as to how often coming home will be possible.

Anyway, as I was having this one lovely stick of Marlboro Lights at the Cottage GI's veranda in SM, I just found myself being bombarded by these seemingly random thoughts of a purely unknown origin. Step inside my head, as it was on June 10, 2007, 4:45 P.M.:

You're alone. But that's okay, you're still hot.

Wow...(me looking below the veranda). There are so many cars parked in that area and that's not even supposed to be a parking lot. Talk about A LOT of cars. Well, duh, I mean those must be tourist-owned cars. Man I really hate tourists. I know they like bring money and whatever economic improvements, but come on, in the long run, Baguio's going to pay big time for all these tourist-catering structures.

Hey I remember that thing (looking over at this circular structure fenced by galvanized iron just across SM). I think we used to go there as kids…oh yeah, we definitely did. I mean the old Pines Hotel pool was just right there, then there are like rocks...and hmm...I don't remember that (notices a little concrete opening right in front of a tree). It looks like a man-made cave. Talk about fertile place for ghosts to live in…creepy! But then, Baguio's known for that.

(Gets annoyed by some sudden noise) What are Koreans even doing here? They're everywhere! It's like some Bubonic plague...I don't like them here. Just as I don't like the tourists...I wonder why Koreans smell so bad.

I wonder what I should do next. I should probably got sit somewhere. Should I even try calling anyone who might meet up? Aims is with her family...Aliah's on her way to Thailand...Maika hasn't informed me as to her whereabouts just yet...Dani's got to rest...Aggy's got something to take care of...and everyone else is just too boring. Haha. Hey, those are my friends. Anyway, they're in Manila now.

And in a few hours, I shall be too.

That sucks.

Nurses are everywhere! Oh yeah, they just had their exam. Oh no, I didn't even wish my nurse friends luck. I'm sure they'll pass it anyway, I mean we're a smart bunch of people...haha. It's kinda odd though that I've been sending them all these funny or mushy or just absolutely meaningless messages that you forward, thanks to the unlimited promo, but then, I forget to tell them what they really need to hear.

This cigarette is taking too long to smoke. I've got to be done with this before someone at Cottage GI's even dares come up to me. Haha. Asshole. I'm here, cigarette on one hand, and clutch bag and umbrella on the other. What a real delightful treat.
Maybe I should just go sit at some cafe. Or maybe not. Waitresses are probably starting to get annoyed by the fact that I just go their cafes to sit and wait for someone. Besides, standing is okay I guess.

Would you look at those shoes (stares down at own brown, leather shoes)... You know one way to tell that a person is from Baguio? If the shoes got some mud on them! Haha! After all, only people from Baguio tread places where concrete is unknown. Hmm…that's one way to tell if a person's from Baguio. I'm sure there are other ways to tell how, but those are usually the meaner ways. Like considering the prevailing discriminatory but totally ignorant attitude of some people who aren’t from here and think that….well, they live in hell, so whatever.

I've got to go buy that player, then go download music.

Makes me that much wiser, thanks for making me a fight-e-er! Haha! Love that song.

Last puff. The cigarette's almost burned out.

Killed it.

Dying.

Dying.

Dead.

Excessively cruel? No! Harsh? Maybe. Honest? Definitely.

You know what bothers me? It's the fact that people don't seem to appreciate honesty much these days. I mean they ask about things like what's wrong with their hair, or if their clothes are just fugly, or if they got personality issues, and when you, you the designated wisdom holder, give them an answer, what do they do? They shatter in front of you! They break down! They crumble to pieces! And they pretty much feel shamed!

Most of all, they wish they had never asked you in the first place!

Unfortunately for them, some things simply can't be undone..and some harsh words simply can't be 'unheard.'

It really just seems strange that some people would have the guts to ask for someone else's (say, me) opinion about an issue that bothers them or causes them some troubles or whatever (say, a person's manner of dressing). Now, the thing is, when a person does that, what he or she is basically doing is asking for an evaluation from that person, under the belief that the latter possesses adequate knowledge or has expertise over the issue concerned. So any advise that is received must be assumed by the inquirer as given in all good faith by the person answering. Why bash the person for telling the truth? Why seek the truth when you can't even handle it? Most of all, why blame someone else for your totally pathetic insecurities that you yourself, out of your utter boredom and idiocy, generate through the meaningless drama that you believe would spice up your otherwise insipid existence?

In case you haven't heard of the classic quote: "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen!" If you offer yourself as the slice of beef to the able chef, willing to do something about you, don't you expect to be cooked?

MORALE: Think twice before asking a person who tells it as it is; you just might hear what others aren't telling you.

Why I Moved...AGAIN!

For reasons of convenience, I am moving to this new blog address. Some of my previous entries from Multiply have been added here as well. Livejournal has proven to be a huge mess.

That's all.

READ ON!